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If there is one crucial mistake that children make, it is assuming that those in the front seat of the car are oblivious to what goes on in the backseat. They think they are unheard when they start going on like, “I’m better than you.” “No, you’re not.” “Yes, I am.” “No, I’m better than you”. “No, you’re not.” “Yes, I am.” “No, you’re not.” “Yes, I am.” “Ok. You are better…better at smelling bad.” That goes on until somebody gets punched. The parent turns and asks, “What are you doing back there?” Knowing that they shouldn’t have been doing what they were doing, the kids answer “Nuthin.” Kids are kids.
The Twelve Disciples here in our reading seem to be having a kids-in-the-backseat moment. They’re walking along behind Jesus and seem to believe he doesn’t know what they are debating about. He knows it’s the old “I’m better than you” bit. When they get home Jesus asks them, “What were you arguing about?” Knowing they were on about something they shouldn’t have been on about, they answer, “Nuthin”.
Then Jesus calls their cards and his psychology is very interesting. It seems he is saying, “If you are going to act like children, remember you are beloved children of God.” Normally, when kids carry on in the backseat like that our parental response isn’t so kind. It’s more like, “Cut it out or I’ll pull this car over and go all Mohammed Ali on y’all and really show you who’s the greatest.” All things considered, I’m truly in awe at Jesus’ “parenting style” here. He shows remarkable restraint considering it is those great, powerful people who will put him to death and here the Twelve are arguing which of them is the greatest. Their denseness in this matter had to be unbelievably frustrating to him.
In the Disciples defense, the pop-culture beliefs about what the Messiah was supposed to do was the polar opposite of what Jesus was saying would happen to him. They were expecting to march into Jerusalem with an army of angels and Jesus would set up the kingdom of God and like princes they would sit on thrones right beside him and rule with him. But who would be his right-hand man? Who was the greatest among them? That yet needed to be decided. Maybe. You see, just a few days before Jesus had singled out Peter, James, and John and took them up a mountain where they saw him transfigured and talking with Moses and Elijah. Jesus giving quality time to those three is probably what started this argument about who’s the greatest.
Jesus soon makes clear that being great and powerful by the world’s standards is not an aspiration his followers should embrace. He teaches them that in his kingdom the truly great ones are those who humbly serve others. The word Jesus uses for servant is the word from which we get our word “deacon”. Deacons in general society back in Jesus’ day were table-waiters. In the church “the Deacon” became an official title for those who served others by doing acts of love or looking after ministries that focused on the real daily needs of people. Deacons did what food bank workers and Personal Support Workers do today. Greatness isn’t having the power to rule over people but rather the humility to serve another person in very hands on, daily needs kind of ways.
Jesus then made his point by doing something that was quite feminine. He hugged a child. This was something a “real Man” wouldn’t do. Men back then did not show affection to children in public. That was a mother’s domain. Men could teach a child to fight, or the work of a trade, or how to read, write, and do math, or the meaning of the Scriptures. But for some odd reason, showing public affection to a child was showing weakness and was thus and so the domain of what was considered back then to be the “weaker” gender.
I hope you see the irony here in what Jesus is doing. The Twelve had been acting childish in arguing over who’s the greatest so Jesus commandeered a nearby child and placed him in the middle of them. It was probably a child they all knew or even a child of one of the Twelve. Jesus then took the child in his arms. He hugged him. Then Jesus said, “Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me; and whoever welcomes me welcomes not me but the one who sent me.” This would have been a shocker to the Twelve. They were expecting to sit on thrones and rule over Israel and here Jesus turns it all upside-down and tells them to welcome, to show hospitality to children – welcome them, love them, cherish children as valued guests in their lives. If they do that, then they will know what God is like.
There is knowledge of God to be gained if we make a spiritual practise out of giving children space in our lives and treating them as most honoured guests. Showing hospitality to children is a way of understanding how God welcomes us into God’s own life to share in the loving relationship that Jesus the Son and God the Father have in the mother-like embrace of the presence of the Holy Spirit.
One lament that so many churches had pre-COVID was that we were all nearly childless. We were longing for the glory days of lots of children because lots of children meant a successful church with a future. It was difficult to have Sunday School and Vacation Bible School programs both for lack of kids and for teachers. Who wanted to come to church only to miss because you had to teach your children or grandchildren in Sunday School. Then there was the “Children’s Sermon”. What if I did the sermon like we did those things? What if I asked the adults in the room questions you didn’t know the answer to only to have everybody laugh at the answer you did give. And then there’s the last hard cold fact about children’s programming – it always involved separating the children from contact with the adult church stuff particularly worship that they were expected to someday transition into…they didn’t and then they decided not to bring their children to church. Something didn’t work.
Now, in the midst of this Pandemic parents are making the prudent decision to not bring their children to church at all because it is one more circle of risk exposure. I am of the opinion that the relationship between the Church and children is now permanently changed and we cannot expect to go the way it was. We have to find a different way to be the Body of Christ for children during and post-Pandemic.
Looking back at Mark, Jesus hugged that child and told the Twelve to welcome such a one, for whoever welcomes a child welcomes him and whoever welcomes him welcomes not him but the One who sent him. How can we do such a thing when there are no children in our midst?
These are difficult days. I recently had a discussion with a mother whose 14-year-old son doesn’t believe in God anymore because of COVID. She and her husband raised in the church and in a Christian home. I don’t fault them nor their church. Their son struggles with the question that if there is a God, particularly a loving God, how could this God let COVID happen? At least 4.7 million have died thus far. There is no easy theological answer for that.
Moreover, people write books on this sort of thing and unless a person is willing take the necessary time and make the necessary effort to understand, then it is nearly pointless to attempt to answer. My short answer is I struggle with that question too and only God can answer for himself. Regardless, bad things do happen in God’s good creation even to good people and bad people don’t always get what they deserve; but, God is with us – God does make his presence felt; if you want to see where God is doing something, go to where there are people who for compassion’s sake are making great sacrifices even at the risk of their lives because that’s the way God is and we know this by Jesus’ death on the cross. In today’s world that’s our health care workers.
Well, let’s turn back to welcoming children into our lives. When Jesus said this to his disciples I think what he had in mind was our actually welcoming children into our lives; other people’s children not simply those of our own families. We don’t need a program of Children’s Ministries to love children. In the very least all we need is to put on a smile and a kind face and have the confidence that stranger danger does not apply to us. If you live in a neighbourhood and there are children, take a few minutes to talk to them. After a while the awkwardness goes away. Talk to young parents being careful to listen to them and be helpful and sooner or later they will discover you’re a follower of Jesus and maybe become interested in Jesus because of you.
Welcome children into your lives. Take the time to get to know the children that are around you. Children are quite anxious at present. The way we welcome children in the love of Christ into our lives as cherished gifts is the way God has welcomed us into his own. Welcoming children is how we adults…who so often carry on like children...learn the nature of how God loves us as his own beloved children. Amen.
